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It’s large, yes, but lightweight compared to other body massagers on the market today. Other clitoral stimulators Melissa recommends include the Lelo Sona Sonic and Clitoral Suction Toy to avoid penetration but still experience pleasure. "If penetration has become painful, these are a great way to slowly and gently reintroduce penetration into your sex life at your own pace," Melissa says of this three-piece dilator set. Redefining pleasure in midlife can require a little homework, Melissa says, adding she often tasks her clients with a short quiz to help them explore what they desire now. "I have worked with women who are in their late 50s who are having the best sex of their lives because we worked on their mindset first and foremost – we know the mind affects the body so we start there," Melissa says.

The Onda has four different stroke positions, so you can stimulate the perfect spot with its 10 vibration intensities. Starsi was designed for all bodies to explore pleasure and can be used with the included removable bullet vibrator or without, in case you are a fan of grinding or just want to stimulate areas with a little less intensity. At 8 inches long, this bulbous beauty steps into the ring and offers a little bit of weight for the full feeling your other toys might be missing. Ultimately, whether a sex toy can positively impact a relationship depends on the individuals involved, their communication, and their mutual openness to exploring new avenues of sexual intimacy. What works for one couple may not work for another, highlighting the importance of personalized and respectful discussions about sexual preferences and boundaries.

She’s a big fan of the Womanizer toy, the shower head they developed, and Hot Octopuss’ pulsating technology. "For someone who just loves sex toys and is a bit obsessed with them, these new technologies are just way more exciting than vibrators are," she adds. It’s a psychedelic shade of bright green and shaped like a tiny rectangle and has a slippery silicone texture. It sounds simple, but it’s the simplicity of the TENGA Uni toy that I love so much.

Many of today's popular options even mimic human genitals, with some offering vibrating or non-vibrating features. The Pom is designed with a ridge to provide targeted clitoral stimulation, but its wide base also lends itself well to sensations across the vulva. It’s a small-but-mighty waterproof vibrator that features five intensity levels and five pattern modes. Made from medical-grade silicone, the Dame Pom is also impressively quiet for how powerful it is. When trying a butt plug, always use sex toys that are specifically designed for anal play.

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Female sex toys aren’t only targeted at the vulva and the vagina, though. Butt plugs have seen a huge increase in popularity over the past few years as sex toys have become more mainstream. Butt plugs come in varying shapes and sizes and are designed to create a full feeling in the anus. You can wear a butt plug during masturbation or during partnered play to give the body even more sensation as your sphincter muscles tighten around the plug.

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